


That One Time Derek Thought Stiles was Possessed (But he totally wasn't - Isn't)

by TonyStarkIsARobot



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Demon!Stiles, Derek is pissed, Humor, M/M, bottom!Derek, seriously this is actually really funny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-30
Updated: 2012-12-30
Packaged: 2017-11-22 22:25:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/615032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TonyStarkIsARobot/pseuds/TonyStarkIsARobot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek thinks Stiles is possessed but in reality, Stiles is just getting back at Derek for all the shit Derek's pulled on him. Slamming into walls, for instance. Leaving him out of plans, for instance. Even though he's his boyfriend, Derek was kind of a dick to Stiles at first. Stiles gets a huuuge payback. In the most hilarious way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	That One Time Derek Thought Stiles was Possessed (But he totally wasn't - Isn't)

**Author's Note:**

> So... Uh... This came about because of this post here: 
> 
> http://loraslahey.tumblr.com/post/39175669835/youre-not-stiles-no-im-not-but-he-is-in
> 
> Originally it was just gonna be the first couple of sentences but god dammit I couldn't stop. So here we have what was originally meta!fic but is now the only drabble I have ever written.
> 
> (Hey guys! I'm currently in a bit of a bind so... Here's a link! With rewards! :D http://www.gofundme.com/AdulthoodSucks )

"HA! Oh man, you should have seen your face," Stiles laughs, doubling over. "You looked like someone who'd just found out his mom ran over his puppy!"

"Stop! You really think I'm going to fall for that? I'm going to find every way I can to destroy you and then I'm going to beat Stiles black and blue," Derek threatens.

Stiles blinks. "Seriously? Dude! I was joking! I really am Stiles!"

"I can smell the sulfur on you!" Derek roars.

"BECAUSE I'M A DEMON! HELLO, BEEN ONE SINCE BIRTH!"

Derek crosses the length of the bathroom between them and slams Stiles into the tiled wall. "I'll let you know when I believe that." Derek puts his arm to Stiles' throat and starts pressing down.

"D-dude c-c-can't... D-Der-" Stiles tries to eek out, words failing to form when his vision goes spotty with red and black and white. He can very easily throw Derek across the room with a single thought but he's trying to get Derek to believe him and throwing him into things - as deserved as it is - won't get him there.

Derek lets up on the pressure marginally. "Why should I let you live?" he hisses.

"Because... I'm... really... Stiles!" the boy gasps out. Derek pushes against his trachea.

"Bullshit."

"Sir- i- ous- ly!" Stiles pushes out.

With the intent to prove this thing wrong and kill the little demonic shit, Derek lets him go and looms over him as he slides to the floor.

"Jesus Christ, could you not try to kill me? One, that won't work. Well actually it will but that's complicated and we'll get to it later. Two, I can prove that I'm Stiles."

Derek kneels before him, eyes going red with that wonderful little grin he gets, especially when he's pissed off. Stiles thinks he liked it better when Derek was trying to slink into the darkness of the showers behind him like a total creep.

"Oh really?"

Stiles roles his eyes. "YES! Oh my God it's like you don't listen to a word I - oh wait, that's actually pretty normal. Look, being a demon doesn't mean I can lie to a werewolf. My heart will still totally blip. I can't control my body - look, it's complicated. Just ask me a question. Any question. Something that literally only I would know."

"How do I know you haven't been inside him this whole time?" Derek says with quiet rage, pushing his face closer to Stiles' with a clear threat on his tongue.

Stiles swipes a hand down his face. "Look, dude, I'm a demon. A legit demon. Yes, I'm possessing a body. But I've been doing this since 'Stiles' was in the womb. He was supposed to be a stillborn. We look for living vessels usually but I vowed to never do that. Made me uncomfortable and I felt guilty about causing somebody that much trauma. Been me the whooole way, baby. And I'm kinda stuck in here now. Fun times, right? I'm literally bound to his skin. So I'm kinda human - RIGHT. Proving it's me. Hey, you know shit about my childhood from me. We've been sleeping together for, like, six months. Go for it."

Derek... Derek is ridiculously surprised and totally shocked to hear that there is literally not a single misstep in the kid's heart. Being Derek, he has very little facial or physical reaction from shock. Yeah, this time? Not so much? Derek falls back, flat on his ass. "I... Okay. How'd - How'd you break your arm in second grade?"

"Fell off a tree when the neighbor's dog chased me up there. Fucking Pomeranians."

Again, no lie. 

"Why do you call yourself Stiles?"

Stiles swipes a hand down his face. He's gonna hate this. "Cause my mom named me after her dad and he died when I was six and then the last word on my mom's mouth was my name so I figured it was cursed."

No lie. Derek's gonna ask one final question that he definitely knows there's no way to talk around. "Do you love me?"

Stiles looks up at Derek, his eyes still black. "Yes."

Derek can't help it. He surges forward and wraps his arms around Stiles after he lightly bashes Stiles' head against the wall. "Why the fuck didn't you- Why the fuck would you scare me like that?!"

"Didn't tell you sooner because I knew you didn't trust me and you'd try to kill me. Then I never would have had a chance to seduce your sexy ass." Stiles smirks before his next sentence; "Call this a little revenge for all the shit you've pulled on me. Like all the times you've threatened to kill me and all the times you hurt me on purpose, you dick. Tossing me into the couch this morning? Really?"

Derek actually... Looks sheepish. Holy fuck call the papers and take a picture or some shit. Derek Hale looking apologetic. "I just... You weren't... I'm sorry. Your gift made me really... Look, I didn't mean to throw you so hard. I guess I was surprised?"

Stiles rolls his eyes. "It's your birthday, asshole. It was supposed to be a gift that would surprise you. Hence the word 'gift'."

"Stiles it was a stripper!"

"Hey, his dick was in a box. Just like the song," Stiles grins, having caught Derek dancing to the song in his kitchen one morning.

"I will fucking kill you if you mention that to anyone."

"Yeah, yeah. I'm terrified. Ooooh Derek Hale's gonna kill me. Like I haven't heard that before.

"I won't suck your dick. Or let you fuck me. For a month."

"Bitch please, that would torture you more than it would torture me. You love my cock. If I remember correctly, you love how it fills you up and how-"

"STILES! DO NOT FINISH THAT. EVER. Come on, let's go tell the pack, you idiot."

Stiles grins. "About the demon thing or the you bottoming thing?"

"The demon thing. And you know what? You can suck your own dick tonight."

Stiles shrugs. "I got the talent and my mouth knows what I like." He already has plans to do it on the couch, in full view of Derek's bedroom.

"Fuck you."

"I intend to."


End file.
